Buttlympics: Explosive Diarrhea Pole Vaulting

This is an intentionally bad game made for So Bad It's Good Jam 2021. Theme: One Button. I interpreted this as "One BUTTon".  (This game has been moved from its original account to this alternate NSFW account).

In a world populated by butts,  butt-people compete in the Buttlympics to show their athletic prowess. You've been training for the explosive diarrhea pole vault event. Do you have what it takes to be a champion?

This game will demonstrate such exceptionally poor taste, such that I'm embarASSed by it. I sincerely apologize for the experience that you are about to partake in, and for releasing this game into the world.

Instructions for Pole Vaulting:

You have 3 tries to leap over the bar without knocking it down. If you succeed, the bar is raised. Try to get the bar as high as possible.

1. Run: Tap the spacebar rapidly to run and build speed.
2. Plant Pole: Hold the spacebar for at least 0.5 seconds to plant the pole and vault up.
3. Release Pole & Thrust: Release the space bar to unclench your cheeks / drop the pole. Any butt pressure at the time of release will be used as additional thrust.

Note: If you're launching prematurely when you intended to run, then it means that you are holding down the spacebar too long, and not tapping it rapidly enough.

Bad-Ass Features:

• Butt athletes.
• Butt audiences numbering in the thousands? (it's random, proc gen, so it may be just in the hundreds)
• Mighty butt mountains and butt hills in the background.
• Clenching the pole with your butt cheeks while you run.
• Generous use of #FF00FF, the error color, and cyan for that retro CGA color palette look.
• My amazing vocal rendition of Aaron Copeland's Fanfare for the Common Man (1942).
• Farting as a propulsion system.
• Persistent poop debris on the track
• A butt pressure meter.
• Ultra faux realistic pole-vaulting physics
• A leaderboard that applies only to your web browser.
• Audience feedback

Third Party Attributions / ASSets:

• Dynamic Bone script by Will Hong (for the floppy butts in the title screen)
• Amplify Imposters library by Amplify Creations to make the audience members without much performance hit
• Crowd sounds from UniversalSoundFX pack

Known Issues:

If you have a very slow computer or certain web browsers, you may need to wait a bit for the bleachers to be populated with the audience, right after the title screen. Just wait a few seconds for it to finish generating, and then play, because it will be laggy when it is generating.